


PB and J Prompts

by Scripturience



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Ficlet, Ficlet Collection, Humanstuck, M/M, but not all of them will be humanstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-18
Updated: 2014-12-29
Packaged: 2018-01-12 21:41:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1201651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scripturience/pseuds/Scripturience
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of short ficlets born from prompts submitted to me by the lovely people of tumblr. All will for the most part be unrelated in terms of plot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Face Paint

**Author's Note:**

> An anon on tumblr sent in: "Tavros asks Gamzee to paint his face!"
> 
> So yeah. Here's that.

It started with idle curiosity. He saw Gamzee wearing it every day. It was basically solidified as part of the teen’s image. Eventually, most people came to know him by it. Along with crazy raven curls and vibrant blue eyes, among Gamzee Makara’s most defining features was his face-paint. Why he wore it? Tavros didn’t know. Despite dating the other boy for over half a year, he never found it appropriate to ask. He doubted Gamzee would care. It was hard to bother the laid back teen. Nonetheless, the Taurus refrained from asking.

Though he did wonder about other things. Tavros had never worn makeup before. He really didn’t have any reason to. Gamzee just sort of…did it. It made him wonder, as strange as it sounds, what it felt like. Although, when he posed the question to his boyfriend while they were lounging in his bedroom, Tavros could honestly say he wasn’t expecting an excited “Motherfucker wanna give it a try?” in response.

Gamzee’s enthusiasm was hard to refuse. Who could say no to a smile like that? Certainly not Tavros.   

And so, the anxious young man found himself squirming on a stool in front of Gamzee’s bathroom mirror. Suddenly he was regretting this decision.

Soon enough, his boyfriend returned, a bin of supplies in hand and a beaming smile on his face. Tavros managed a sheepish grin, trying his best to mimic Gamzee’s elation. Though he began to wonder why he was even worrying in the first place. The other teen was experience enough with this sort of thing; he applied his own face-paint every day. Or so Tavros assumed, anyway.

With a deep breath, he composed himself. “So uh, let’s get started,” Tavros said, giving a (now genuine) smile. Somehow Gamzee’s expression brightened even more, as he walked over to set his tools on the counter.

Tavros straightened himself in his seat, focusing his eyes on the mirror in front of him. He could see the other teen fumbling with the contents of the poorly organized bin out of the corner of his eye. Eventually Gamzee must’ve found what he was searching for. He circled around to Tavros’ left, carrying a sponge already dampened with a grey substance. Tavros scrunched his eyes shut as Gamzee gently dragged the tool across his face. The paint was cooler than he expected, though not quite cold. It felt strange on his skin, so much so that the Taurus had to resist the urge to scratch at or smudge it. He kept his eyes closed, as the makeup was progressively applied over his cheeks. After a while he was able to ignore the strange sensation of the grease paint on his skin, and found that the feeling of the sponge gently moving over his face was actually quite nice.

Tavros almost found himself drifting off during the process. He actually might have, if not for the feeling of a sponge with newly applied white paint coming uncomfortably close to his eye. He winced visibly at the touch, causing Gamzee to halt his actions.

Tavros opened an eye to see his boyfriend giving him a concerned look. “I’m fine! You can uh, keep going. Really!” He did his best to sound reassuring. When he saw the taller teen shrug, he shut his eye once more and did his best to relax himself.

It was more difficult to adjust to the feeling of brushes moving over and around his eyes, but Tavros just forced himself to deal with it. He trusted Gamzee. Besides, it wasn’t like the paint would kill him.

Finally, much to Tavros’s relief, both of his eyes were finished. Then, after a quick layer of white around the outside of his mouth (Gamzee decided against painting over his lips), they were done.

“All finished, motherfucker,” Gamzee announced. Tavros cautiously allowed his eyes to open. His boyfriend stood next to him, proudly examining his own handiwork.

When his gaze fell on the mirror, the Taurus felt his eyes widen a little in awe. It was nothing unfamiliar. Gamzee had given him a similar style to the one he himself wore. Regardless, seeing it on his own face was…weird. He found that he sort of liked it though. He tilted his head, trying to get a good look at all the angles.

“So,” Gamzee began “What do you think?”

Rising out of the chair, Tavros leaned up to place a chaste kiss to his lover’s lips.

“It’s perfect.”


	2. Sweet Goodbyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> colorfulcheshire, the darling that she is (you guys should all go check out her stuff), sent in: "gamtav prompt - UA sadstuck: A timeline in which Gamzee goes insane earlier than he's supposed to, and it looks like Tavros is the only one that can stop him, for good."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To start, this chapter has some specific warnings. First of all, it's sadstuck. Also there will be character death. You know, in case the prompt didn't give it away already. So if those things aren't your cup of tea, feel free to skip this chapter.
> 
> Also I kind of cheated? Instead of Gamzee going crazy sooner Tavros just stays alive longer. I hopes that's uh, acceptable and all that. Also this is kind of like a stream of consciousness (Tavros's perspective), but not entirely. It's weird. So if anything seems "different" or whatever, please keep in mind that's why.

His embrace. It was always so assuring. Tavros never felt safer than when long arms laced underneath his, pulling him back into his matesprit’s chest. His body was cold. All highbloods were. Tavros didn’t mind. The contrasting temperature felt nice against his skin. The comfort, the security. It was something the brown blood never got tired of. Every time Gamzee tried to surprise him with a greeting hug, it brought warm smiles to his face.

Never would he ever have imagined associating it with fear.

* * *

Dread. Terror. Tavros could never forget that day.

The smell. The pungent odor of fresh blood that made his skin crawl.

The feeling of soaked arms moving against his skin to wrap around him. The splashes of indigo and olive against grey. The familiar voice that suddenly sounded so very wrong in his ears. The shiver that came when cool breath hit his neck. The pieces that fit together all too quickly.

The realization he never wanted to have.

* * *

Everything had changed. His voice, his words, his touch. They were all wrong. Nothing was the way it should have been. And it made Tavros sick to his stomach.

He had to stop his body from shaking when they embraced. When loving words were whispered into his ear, he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about genocidal vows. About two fallen friends.

Everyone was afraid. Tavros tried to convince himself that he wasn’t. He wasn’t supposed to be. They were matesprits.

He could only lie to himself for so long.

* * *

Admitting it to himself was one of the hardest things he had to do. This was not Gamzee. And he refused to accept that it was.

Gamzee didn’t threaten people.

Gamzee wasn’t violent.

Gamzee wasn’t a murderer.

But regardless of what Tavros told himself, two trolls were still dead and the culprit promised more.

He was going to kill them all. He said it. Tavros didn’t want to believe it, but even if Karkat wanted to lie to him, the purple text on the screen couldn’t.

He wondered if that threat included himself. Even now Gamzee promised he would keep him safe. He made it harder to trust him every day.

But he did want to kill the others. Regardless of whether or not Tavros was counted among them, it wasn’t something he wanted to see happen.

* * *

 No one was going to do anything. Some were too afraid, others didn’t care. The last troll sent to “deal” with Gamzee didn’t come back. Tavros was painfully aware of this.

He wanted to kill them all. All of their friends.

Tavros didn’t like thinking about it. About how no one was going to stop him. No one _else_.

And who would be better for the task? Who but the troll who was always at his side. The troll in his flushed quadrant. The most unassuming troll of them all.

* * *

He couldn’t. How could he?

Even if Gamzee had changed, they were matesprits.

They pitied each other. Their relationship couldn’t have been more red.

Even if Gamzee terrified him.

Even if Gamzee was a murderer.

They were matesprits.

* * *

Tavros Nitram had never been more afraid in his entire life. He wasn’t even sure what he was scared of. It wasn’t for his own sake. He knew that much.

His lance shook in his trembling hands. No matter how hard he tried the bronze blood couldn’t will his breathing to even out.

He was standing there. Completely unsuspecting. Why would he be?

Tavros tried to choke back his tears. With a heavy swallow, the troll forced his quaking legs to move.

He didn’t think. He couldn’t let himself think. If he thought about it, he wouldn’t be able to do it.

At the sound of hurried footsteps, the other troll motioned to turn around.

And for the briefest moment, they locked eyes. He couldn’t look. He couldn’t look into the eyes of the troll of who despite everything he was still flushed for.

Squeezing his already bronze soaked eyes shut, Tavros kept running.

The tip of his spear pierced Gamzee’s chest almost too easily.

He didn’t scream. He didn’t cry out, or yell. The highblood only let out a strangled gasp of air.

When he looked over his shoulder with a barely audible “…Tav?” the brown blood couldn’t take it anymore.

He couldn’t answer him.

Instead, he was the one screaming.

Tavros cried out as if he had been the one stabbed. Bronze tears ran down his face, dripping over the purple blood that splattered across his body.

He actually did it. He attacked Gamzee, and now he was bleeding out right before his eyes.

The troll in front of him coughed, his whole body convulsing. Tavros did his best to lower him to the ground, his own body shaking in the process.

The highlood’s head fell in Tavros’s lap. Blood was running out of his mouth.

There was so much. So much blood.

He couldn’t stop crying.

“I…I’m so sorry,” he managed to speak between sobs, shaking his head.

Gamzee didn’t answer him. He probably couldn’t have if he wanted to. Instead, all Tavros’s matesprit responded with was a smile.

The smile that was so full of warmth. The smile Gamzee would greet him with every day. The smile Tavros never wanted to forget; that he was worried he wouldn’t be able to remember anymore.

He made a weak motion with his arm, attempting to lift his hand off the ground. Tavros took it in his own, rubbing his thumbs over the back of Gamzee’s knuckles. He felt so cold.

He didn’t remember how long they stayed there. He didn’t even remember when Gamzee passed. Tavros stayed regardless. He didn’t know if it was more for Gamzee’s sake, or his.

It wasn’t supposed to be this way. This was wrong. Everything was wrong.

They were matesprits.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was a thing. If any of you wouldn't mind, I would very much like to know what you thought of this one. It would mean a lot to me.


	3. Call Me Neighbor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An anon on tumblr sent in:"For the prompt thing what if human au Gamzee and Tavros were pen pals and stuff and they both think that the other lives super far away but they actually live right across the hall from each other (apartment??) and Gamzee is always gushing over how cute his neighbor is and Tavros is occasionally mentions his neighbor and how cool he seems and how they wish they could talk to each other and stuff and one day they bump into each other in the hall and introduce themselves and they're like YouRE HIM"

Tavros Nitram stepped into his apartment, nudging the door shut behind him. With an exhausted sigh, he shrugged off his backpack, and hung his keys up on the designated hook near the entryway. He leaned over, unzipping his bag and pulling his laptop out of it before making his way over to the couch.

His roommate wasn’t home yet, so he had the entire apartment to himself. Normally he didn’t mind the company, but today, Tavros was completely exhausted. Finals week was rearing its ugly head, and all of his professors seemed to be trying to squeeze in as much content as they could before their respective test dates.

He flopped down onto the sofa, his back cracking in the process, thanks to the extra work he had to haul around campus all day. With a groan, Tavros put his feet up on the opposite armrest, and propped his laptop open.

While he would have liked to take a nap, Tavros unfortunately, could not. He had far too much class work to do today. Though he had no intentions of starting on that right away. A bit of down time and procrastination was in order. Hopefully, that would help him recharge at least a little, before Tavros would have to tackle his mountain of obligations: school related or otherwise.  

When the machine resting on his legs finally booted up, the first thing Tavros did was maneuver his cursor across the screen to hover over the Skype icon. With a practiced double click, the chat application logged him in automatically and started up.

A small smile grew on his face when the familiar notification in the corner informed him that Gamzee was online.  

As usual, Tavros received a message almost immediately upon logging on.

“SuP, tAv? :O)”

He wondered how his friend always messaged him so quickly. Especially considering his…unusual, typing style.

“oH, hI GAMZEE, i’M ALRIGHT, i GUESS,,,” Tavros promptly typed out his response.

Tavros and Gamzee had been friends for quite a few years now. He only faintly remembered how exactly they met. If he recalled correctly it was over a gaming forum. Either way, from that point on they had talked a little bit more. Ever since, they’d become a lot closer.

Tavros did get curious from time to time, though. They had never seen each other’s faces before, so he had absolutely no idea what his friend looked like. They had done audio calls a few times, but the quality wasn’t very good. Although it did give Tavros a general idea of what Gamzee sounded like, and from what he could tell, he actually had quite a nice voice. Though he never told him so. It wasn’t exactly a normal thing to just casually tell your internet friends…

“So, YoU tAlK tO tHe MoThErFuCkEr YeT?”

Tavros frowned a little at the question. He had hoped Gamzee wouldn’t bring that up today.

The ‘motherfucker’ he was referring to, was Tavros’s neighbor. He lived directly across the hall, and that was pretty much all the Taurus knew about him aside from what he looked like. He was tall, really tall, with a thick head of wild black curls. He also had the brightest blue eyes Tavros had ever seen in his life. He tended to dress a little on the strange side, though they ran into each other once when he was wearing a uniform of some kind. He had probably either just left for or just returned from his job.

If Tavros was being honest with himself, he might have had a bit of a crush on this guy. Ever since he told Gamzee about his neighbor, his friend earnestly tried to convince him to approach his crush nearly every time they spoke.

“nO,,,nOT YET }:/”

And in reality, Tavros really didn’t have any intentions of doing so. Not anytime soon, anyway.

The thought of talking to him made his stomach turn. Besides, Tavros didn’t even know his name. How was he supposed to just casually strike up a conversation? Even if he did somehow muster the courage to approach this guy, he’d probably just make a fool of himself anyway. It was for the best.

“yOu ShOuLd TaLk To HiM tOdAy. MoThErFuCkEr WoUlD pRoBaBlY aLl Up AnD aSk YoU oUt On ThE sPoT ;O)”

Tavros couldn’t help but laugh to himself at the suggestion.

“iN, uH, MY DREAMS MAYBE }:)”

“nAh, i GeT yA bRo. yOu KnOw I gOt ThE sAmE pReDiCaMeNt MySeLf.”

Gamzee had told Tavros once that he himself also had a “hot across the hall neighbor.” Though he wasn’t talking to this person for completely different reasons than Tavros’s.

Just as Tavros would go on and on about how he wished he had the guts to approach the handsome stranger across the hall, Gamzee would gush over the “unbelievably cute motherfucker” in his building.

Gamzee described himself quite bluntly as ‘LoOkIn’ LiKe A mOtHeRfUcKiN’ fReAkShOw!’ And while he wasn’t normally one to care about such things, he was worried that he would scare his neighbor off before they even had a chance to talk to each other.

Still, it brought Tavros comfort to know that he wasn’t the only one out there with a problem like this. Even if it seemed like a weird coincidence.

When he was about to start typing up his reply, Tavros noticed out of the corner of his eye that his laptop batter was critically low.

“oH, uM, I’LL BE RIGHT BACK, i HAVE TO PLUG MY COMPUTER IN,,, sORRY }:(“

“NaH bRo, DoN’t WoRrY aBoUt It. ThIs MoThErFuCkEr WaS jUsT aBoUt To Up AnD tAkE cArE oF sOmE bUsInEsS hImSeLf :O)”

After saying their quick goodbyes, Tavros went over to fish his laptop charger out of his bookbag. While he was already so close to the door, he figured he might as well go out get the mail. Gamzee said he was going to be busy anyway.

Grabbing his keys, Tavros stepped out into the hallway and locked the door behind him. After shoving his keys into his pocket, he began his walk down the hallway towards the elevator.

Soon enough, Tavros reached his destination, and pressed the button clearly labeled with a down facing arrow. Noticing that the elevator wasn’t on his floor already, he decided to play with phone while he waited.

Tavros abruptly looked up from his device when he noticed someone walking up next to him. He very quickly turned his attention back to it, however, when he saw who that person was. His neighbor glanced at the elevator buttons, but didn’t press anything. Which meant that he was also going down. Shit.

Tavros wondered if it was too late to make a break for the stairs. Though that would be pretty awkward considering he was very clearly waiting for an elevator when his crush walked over.

His inner turmoil quickly became irrelevant, however, as a telltale ‘ding’ signaled the elevator’s arrival.

As soon as the doors opened, his neighbor briskly stepped inside. With a deep breath and a gulp, Tavros followed suit.

He just had to calm himself down. Why was he even so nervous? It was just a stupid elevator ride. It would be over before he knew it.

The doors closed just as Tavros was wedging himself into the furthest possible corner from the other passenger. As the machine began making its decent, he gave his crush a quick sideways glance. When his neighbor grinned at him in response, Tavros immediately looked back down at his phone.

Maybe Gamzee was right. Maybe he should just talk to this guy. If he just introduced himself, it’s not like it could do any harm. And he could finally stop wondering about his name.

With a deep breath, Tavros cleared his throat. “Uh…hi,” he said, turning to face him. He noticed the other man’s eyes widen. Did he mess up already? He only said two words….

“My name’s, um…” He continued “I’m Tavros.” He said a little too quickly, extending his hand.

The last thing Tavros expected, was the man standing in front of him to grab his arm and forcefully drag him into an uncomfortably tight hug.

Tavros’s face heated up, as he felt a blush covering his cheeks. “U-um?”

“Gamzee,” a gruff voice said near his ear. “Name’s Gamzee.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This prompt was so amazing that I couldn't NOT do it. 
> 
> Though I am sorry if I didn't do it the justice it deserves. I tried.


	4. Sweet Suffering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leticheecopae sent it: "GamTav : Make it yourself cotton cady machines aren't as easy as they look."

Gamzee all but sprinted down the halls of the apartment building, cradling a bag containing a box underneath his arm. When he finally reached his door, he practically flung it open in his childlike excitement. The sound of the doorknob colliding with the adjacent wall nearly caused Tavros to jump out of his seat.

But before the Taurus could even ask what the hell his boyfriend was doing, Gamzee slammed the bag and its contents on the kitchen counter. 

“Tav!” He huffed, visibly out of breath “Tav! Look what this motherfucker picked up?”

“Alright…” Tavros complied, rising to his feet. He was still incredibly confused, but figured humoring his lover couldn’t hurt.

After shutting the door that Gamzee nearly decimated (and forgot to close), Tavros walked over and stood next him at the counter. He raised an eyebrow, studying the bag whose contents were still obscured. If he recalled correctly, Tavros asked Gamzee to grab a few things for dinner tonight. And then he came back with…whatever this was.

“So uh, what is it?” Tavros asked, gesturing to the object in front of them.

“Glad you asked, Tavbro!” Taking hold of the plastic bag, Gamzee whipped it away, as if he was a magician doing some sort of grand reveal. The motion caused the box to tumble forward with a loud thud. Tavros winced slightly, fearing for whatever was inside. Hopefully Gamzee didn’t waste their money on something frivolous and then break it, to top it off. 

“Magical Cotton Candy Machine?” Tavros read the colorful printing on the box aloud, his confusion only growing.

“Isn’t it miraculous bro?!” Gamzee could hardly contain himself at the sight of it.

Well, it was better than nothing. He could have come back with nothing.

Rather than wait for Tavros’s thoughts on the matter, Gamzee immediately began ripping away at the cardboard box. He hacked away at the cheap packaging with a ferocity that made the Taurus’s eyes widen as he watched from a safe distance.

When he was finally finished, Gamzee stepped aside to reveal a pile of plastic wrapped parts strewn about the counter.

“Aw, what?” He sulked, frowning at his new purchase in pieces.

Out of the corner of his eye, Tavros spied a fragment of colorful cardboard printed with the words ‘some assembly required.’ With a sigh, he reached over and grabbed one of the pamphlets of paper near the machine components.

“Well,” he muttered, flipping through the pages “It looks like we need a screwdriver to put this together….”

“Yeah?” Gamzee said absent mindedly, sifting through pile of pieces that would have been his cotton candy machine.

“…We don’t have a screwdriver,” Tavros continued.

Suddenly he had Gamzee’s attention. He turned to his boyfriend, giving him the most pathetic pleading look Tavros had ever seen.

“Gamzee….” Tavros groaned, setting the instruction booklet down.

* * *

Before he knew it, they had walked 3 blocks to the nearest department store, purchased an entire toolset that they would likely never need to use ever again, and then made the trek back to the apartment. Gamzee nearly busted down the door once again, unable to contain his excitement at his second unnecessary purchase of the evening.

Tavros slinked over the couch, collapsing into the cushions. It was getting late as far as he could tell, and they still hadn’t eaten dinner yet. Nonetheless, he ignored the hunger and fatigue as Gamzee set to work in the kitchen. Or rather, he tried to, anyway.

Tavros found himself being shaken awake, his boyfriend informing him of his success in assembling the ‘miraculous cotton candy machine.’ With a stretch and a yawn, he pulled himself up from the sofa and followed Gamzee into the kitchen, briefly wondering how late it had to be by then.

He was actually slightly surprised to see what appeared to be a fully operational cotton candy machine on the counter before him. He never knew Gamzee to be very good with that type of thing.

“Wow,” Tavros said, genuinely impressed “So, are we going to uh, try it out?”

“Yeah, about that…” Gamzee said rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Gamzee…” He said almost warningly.

“Ya see,” Gamzee continued “Machine didn’t all up and come with any miraculous cotton candy powder.”

“Gamzee….” He repeated, voice filled with a mixture of desperation and dread.

* * *

Somehow, despite his best attempts to be stern, Gamzee had talked Tavros into their second trip to the store at whatever vaguely late hour it was. Fortunately, (or not so fortunately) the one nearest to them was open 24 hours a day.

After searching nearly every aisle in the entire establishment, Gamzee triumphantly proclaimed that he had found the cotton candy mix. He was once again bubbling with anticipation as they brought their sole purchase to the register.

Finally, after what would hopefully be their final walk back to the apartment for the evening, Gamzee and Tavros returned home. The Taurus dragged himself over to the counter, letting his head rest on the faux marble surface in exhaustion.

Gamzee plugged in the machine and switched it on. It whirred to life, blowing hot exhaust out of its multiple vents (and into Tavros’s face). Tearing open a small packet, he dumped the sugary powder into the bowl of the device. The Capricorn’s face lit up, as faint wisps of the brightly colored treat began to form. He snatched up one of the included (thank God) conical sticks and plunged it into the swirling mass of processed sugary delight.

Tavros had to admit, the look of sheer amazement on his lover’s face during the process almost made the whole mess worth it. Almost.

Then, finally, the stick was pulled out of the bowl of the machine, covered in a cloud of cotton candy. Gamzee raised it to his mouth and bit out a chunk of the fluffy substance. Near instantly, his face twisted in disgust. He turned over to the sink and spit out the mouthful.

“Shit’s nasty!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm losing control over my life.


	5. Hoenn Confirmed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> b0yskylark sent in: "frost, gamtav hoenn confirmed fic. it's needed, please?"

Tavros Nitram flung open the apartment door, before stepping inside and practically slamming it shut. He stumbled into the living room, where Gamzee was sitting idly waiting for him to come home.

“Tav?” he asked concerned.

The Taurus was flushed and out of breath, as if he had run the entire way home from the bus stop. He was panting and barely able to stand, leaning on an end table for support.

“G-Gamzee-“ he wheezed, reaching out to his boyfriend.

The Capricorn went wide eyed in confusion “Tav? Tavbro, what’s wrong?”

Tavros only shook his head, still panting from his sprint home.

Gamzee rose to his feet, hastily moving into the kitchen to fetch the exhausted teen a glass of water.

By the time he got back, Tavros had already collapsed onto the couch. He accepted the beverage, quickly chugging the water down with relief.

“Now,” Gamzee said, sitting next to him “What was so important that a motherfucker had to all up and run himself down here?!”

Turning to face him, Tavros said with a serious tone and an earnest gleam in his eyes “Hoenn confirmed.”

Gamzee’s expression quickly did a 180, from mild concern to unbridled excitement.

“Aw what?!” He practically beamed.

“Y-yeah!” Tavros nodded back.

“You mean trick houses?!” He went on.

“Yeah!” Tavros repeated.

“And real fuckin’ contests?!” Gamzee said rising to his feet.

“Yes!” Tavros followed suit

“And _trumpets?!_ ”

“Y-yeah!!”

“All in 3D!” The two shouted, nearly in unison.

After a heartfelt embrace accompanied by tears of joy, they each grabbed their respective 3Ds and spent the rest of the evening replaying Pokémon X and Y like the giant nerds they were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Then they cried about X and Y's nonexistent post-game. 
> 
> Try not to take this one too seriously. Or seriously at all. I thought this would just be a quick, fun thing to do because why not?
> 
> On that note, this is also the shortest chapter to date.


	6. Holdup Hookup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Oh oh oh I got a pbj prompt if your open for em! Trapped in a bank during a robbery AU, like strangers meeting whilst hiding or something :o)"

Tavros might have misheard, but he was pretty sure that when the terrifying masked men with the guns shouted "Stay quiet and get on the ground," they meant what they were saying.

Which was why when the strange looking guy huddled in the corner next to him tried to get his attention, all he could reply with was a near silent, confused "...um?"

Granted, it wasn't the most polite way to respond to a stranger who wanted to talk to you, but then again, this was hardly appropriate timing for pleasant conversation. Or at least, he thought so, anyway...   
  


"I said," his fellow hostage spoke again, louder this time. Tavros could hear more of his voice now, which had a slightly grovely sound to it "I like your shirt, motherfucker."

Tavros raised an eyebrow at him, his face taking on an expression of pure disbelief. While he himself was also quite fond of the current shirt he was wearing (a grey T-Shirt with large pokeball on the front), it was probably not worth grabbing the attention of the  _armed_ robbers currently holding the place down. 

"Hey!" Tavros flinched, shrinking back into the corner he was hunched over in at the sound of a booming voice "Keep it the fuck down over there!" 

Speaking of the robbers....

His new companion, however, was completely unfazed. In fact, now that Tavros got a better look at him, he seemed almost unnaturally calm considering the state of things. Then again, the fact that he thought a Pokemon shirt to be of any importance in a situation like this of all times, should have been telling on its own. 

"Name's Gamzee," Tavros winced when he spoke again "Yours?" He asked, scooting just a little closer to the fake plant the other was hiding behind. 

Really, how could his luck be any worse? All he came here to do was cash a check, and then the place gets held up. Of all the banks, of all the days, it had to be the one he decided to frequent. And to make matters worse, now a weird scruffy looking man was going to expose his already feeble attempt at hiding behind a fake tree . 

Well, at the very least, he was speaking more quietly this time. That had to count for something, right?

Instead of replying, however, Tavros gave a nervous nod towards the thieves at the counter.   
  
"Nah," the guy waved him off dismissively "Don't worry about those motherfuckers. My bro told me about this shit, they never actually kill anyone."

Once again, Tavros could only gawk at him in disbelief. He supposed that would explain at least a little of his laid back attitude, though he was questioning how this man's brother would have that kind of knowledge. Rufioh never talked to him about anything other than his scandalous affair and anime. Neither of which had any relevance to a bank robbery. 

Regardless, this stranger seemed to have enough confidence in the situation to make smalltalk, no matter how unwilling his fellow hostage tried to make himself seem. 

"Tavros," he answered the earlier question, figuring it was better to placate this guy before he started speaking more loudly again. Then again, entertaining the idea of talking to him didn't seem like the best option either. Really though, it's not like there was a plethora of options in a hostage situation. Not that Taros considered himself experienced. 

"Nice to meeta ya, Tav." Gamzee whispered back to him, a bright smile on his face. "Say," he began, keeping the wide grin on his face "you doin' anything after this?"

'I hope,' was the first answer that popped into Tavros's head. Which was probably not a good sign, considering he should have been more surprised that someone he met during a _bank robbery_  was asking that question. 

"I don't..know" He answered mostly honestly, a confused look still evident on his face. And yet somehow, this guy still seemed completely oblivious to it. 

Then again, Tavros was beginning to think that might be the case with most things. 

"Hmmm," Gamzee hummed, a pensive look on his face as his eyes wandered to the ceiling. "Wanna grab some coffee with this motherfucker later?"

At this point, he couldn't even say he was surprised. Like most things Gamzee said to him thus far, though, he was still too baffled to come up with a clear answer. Mostly, he was still in shock over the situation itself, let alone the fact that someone was trying to proposition him during a heist. 

Wait a minute...

"If you're quiet?" Tavros offered, a nervous tone to his already quiet voice. He bit his lip, afraid of what kind of reaction that would draw out of the chatterbox sitting next to him. 

He nearly sighed in relief, however, when Gamzee replied with a pleased (but quiet) "Sounds like a plan." 

Well, under normal circumstances, Tavros wouldn't know how to feel about going out for coffee with someone like...this. But all things considered, shutting him up and increasing their chances for survival was well worth the cost. 

And much to his own relief, Gamzee actually made good on his word, not making a single sound, smalltalk included, until the police had fainlly gained control of the situation. 

Then, before they knew it, after a terrifying but brief shoot out (which Gamzee was still non-nonchalant about) Tavros found himself sitting across the table at a starbucks, making smalltalk with the most undoubtedly strange person he ever met. 

If there was a weirder way to start dating someone, Tavros still could not think of one to this day. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What


End file.
